Fall is coming and seasons are changing

I'm normally pretty faithful to this blog. It's been a fun way to share my stories of LA and my acting adventures in Hollywood. Some stories have been fun, others have been frustrating but it's been one exciting adventure.

But seasons change and feelings change. I look at my actions and I question why I wanted this in the first place. I don't think my intentions were bad. Maybe naive, maybe idealistic, maybe shallow, but not evil or malicious. But instead of changing others, as I had wanted to, I found that Hollywood was changing me.

I used to be proud of who I was as a person. I was a smart, caring, sweet girl that enjoyed learning and helping others. I had frizzy hair and busy eyebrows and I would leave wearing my mom's hand-me-downs because I really didn't care about my appearance. I figured no one would care about what I looked like.

Hollywood changes people. When I talk to my group of friends who are in the entertainment industry, I seem to be fine by all standards. I'm right on track with where I need to be. But when I talk with people outside of acting, I'm almost ashamed of who I am and what I have become. I've become labeled as one of "those" girls, and it's not who I want to become.

After several talks with some trusted friends, I've decided to back away from Hollywood slowly. Because of several contracts that I have signed, I cannot walk away altogether yet, but I'm starting to pursue my other interests in hopes of becoming a young woman God can be proud of.

I'm glad I went on this journey though. I've created so many wonderful memories and I've met quite a few amazing people. God has been so faithful and blessed me in so many ways, I'm certain it was His will for me to come to LA.

Now onto the next step. I don't know when, where, how or what, but with God on my side I'm ready to face anything that comes.

Year One. Nearly Done.

It's been one year. One year since I left school, said goodbye to a regular 9-5 job offer and embarked to the world of acting. One year since I left my little local youth talent agency and signed with a much larger LA talent agency. Almost one year since I signed with my manager.

What a year. It was the year I finally moved out of my family's home and moved to a big city on my own. It was the year I got my first grown up full time job. It was the year I learned the realities of this show business. I got rejected more times than I could ever care to count, I booked several wonderful projects I was honored to work on, and I learned so much about myself.

Year two begins now (technically at the beginning of August). I am wiser, smarter and just one tiny year older. Things haven't worked out as ideally as I would like, but I'm still in a place I'm comfortable with for now.

So new plan for this year: I'm going to regroup and study. I think I'm ok if I don't have any auditions for awhile, as I just want to focus on learning and growing and not being so "green" (the terribly annoying phrase I keep hearing). I'm going to study my butt off, polish myself for a few months, then attempt to come back with a vengeance in a few months.

I'm excited for the future, though it isn't the step forward I was hoping for. I'm still convinced I was called to come out to LA, though for what reason, I am still unsure of. I don't know anything at all actually - where I'll be in a year, what I'll be pursuing, who I'll be with, when this will happen, but I know my God has a plan and a purpose and He will guide me to wherever He sees fit.

Summertime and the living is easy

So technically summer doesn't start until June 21st but I'm going to start celebrating now anyway.

This past week has been such a fun week. Last Friday I got a call from my agent asking me to go to a last-minute audition. Never one to pass up an opportunity to get out of the house, I eagerly said yes and hopped in my car and drove across town. The audition was SO much fun and I found out on Monday I booked the job. So here was my week's schedule:

Monday - fitting #1 in Venice Beach. I got to meet the directors for photography stills and for the commercial, the agency people, the wardrobe stylists and a lot of the other talent. I spent 3 hours trying on different outfits from racks and racks of clothes.

Tuesday - fitting #2 in the Universal Studios backlot. It was pretty cool to see all of the tour groups in the backlot as I got fitted for the commercial. Lots of outfit changes and costumes. Did I mention this ad campaign is for the European market? Aside from the talent that was mostly American, everyone else was from France and England. It was pretty cool to hear so much French everywhere.

Thursday - print shoot. We went to this gorgeous property (which was HUGE! Mansion would be much more fitting than house) to shoot the print part of the campaign. I arrived, had a wonderful breakfast and went to hair and makeup. Then I sat in a chair for an hour as two lovely women styled my hair, did my makeup and gave me a manicure. The photographer was incredible, as well as the two guys who handed the coffee. Prior to this, I had not done a food product advertisement before, so it was interesting to see how much work went into making my expresso cup look perfect. After every few frames they would switch out my coffee to keep it hot and steaming and to keep the foam perfect. Then I got to see my photos - I wish I got a copy of them! They were absolutely perfect. It was me wrapped up in a blanket sitting by a window with a steaming cup of coffee looking outside at the "snow" they sprayed on the windows. The lighting was soft and romantic and just absolutely incredible. I was in and out within 4 hours which I was thankful for.

Friday - commercial. This was a little more chaotic and a much bigger production than I had imagined. Fortunately I was again the first one to be shot. There were a lot more people than at the print shoot and 8 production trucks lined on this tiny street. I felt so bad for the neighbors! This time I got to sit on the steps and drink more coffee. My outfit was very European - lots of layers, hat, scarf and these amazing boots. I finished shooting within 2 hours of arriving, but they had me hang around for a few more hours. I still finished by 2pm and I went home and napped.

So it was such a great week and the perfect way to celebrate the beginning of summer. Let's hope it was an omen for the rest of summer - full of fun and bookings!

Strangest Phone Call From My Agent

Before I go off into my story, I feel that everyone needs some background first. My agent almost never calls me. If I don't confirm an audition within an hour, my agency will have the receptionist or interns call me with information about the audition. But my agent herself won't call me, unless it's good news.

So yesterday around 5 (which is late) I get a call from my agent. I answer thinking it's about a paycheck I can come pick up for the job I filmed a couple of weeks ago or maybe an audition for tomorrow. Nope. She says I'm on avail for Sony! Whoo! I'm always happy to hear I'm on avail. But here comes the weird part: she said I must have filmed for them in the past and they called to see my schedule for next week. Wait, what? I've never filmed for Sony. In fact, I don't even know what audition they're talking about, as I've auditioned for 3 different Sony projects in the past few weeks. Plus I don't think any of my auditions went particularly well and I didn't go to callbacks for any of them. And I start to think they may have had the wrong girl...

So I ask my agent and she says not to worry about it. Just keep my days clear.

So they're open! I have no idea whether to celebrate or not. If I'm released from the avail, I don't think I'll be too disappointment, as I'm still so confused. What?? However, wouldn't it be awesome if I booked this project I have no idea about?

Fingers crossed with one hand and a confused head scratch with the other.

:)

Audition prep

I'm rather frustrated.

I don't know whether it's my long day of work or my past history of theatrical auditions or what, but I'm so frustrated with this audition tomorrow.

I want it SO badly. So so badly. I'm praying and having everyone around me pray for me. I went to private coaching and paid $100 for one hour of help for 4 pages. That's $25 a page of help. With maybe 6 or 7 lines per page.

I've been practicing like crazy every spare moment I can. But for whatever reason I can't get this character. It's not making sense...the puzzle pieces are getting to the right place, but aren't "fitting" yet. I don't know how to describe it. It's just not where I want it to be yet. I'm not this character yet.

Time is ticking. I have less than 24 hours before this audition.

Lord please help me.

Two down, onto next projects!

So I finished filming my industrial. The director and crew were absolutely amazing and I couldn't ask for anything better. It was really low pressure and everyone was really nice. Taylor (my co-star) was such a sweetheart and I'm excited that he is getting married soon. Congrats Taylor!

I've been crazy busy with work, as my work decided to add on a temporary extra day shift since we're in the middle of a project, so it's been kind of hard to juggle two full time jobs (lots of overlap). Sadly because they're having me work on Mondays, I've temporarily stopped my acting class because it's too exhausting and stressful to do it all in one day.

Meanwhile I just signed up for krav maga classes (Isreali martial arts) with my good friend Sami and I'm in love. It's so empowering to know that I could defend myself if need be.

Tomorrow is a crazy day - 10am I'll be coaching for a major audition on Monday, then 1pm I'll be driving off to work until 4pm, back at home by 5pm and ready to work my second job from 6pm-midnight. Then it's an 8am wake up the next day for my other job. If I can I'll try to make it to church at 7pm (and leave work for a couple of hours). Whew...I'm exhausted just thinking about it.

Have a wonderful night lovelies.

One down, one to go

Whew! So I finished filming on Wednesday and it was an all around amazing day. I met my co-hosts and the crew and everyone was incredibly sweet. It felt pretty surreal to be sitting on the set, with the lights all around and three cameras, sitting next to such amazing people. I couldn't have asked for a better group.

I don't want to spill too many details about the show, but here's a fun story from set: one of my lines had the name "Gotti" in there. For whatever reason, I kept saying "Getty" instead of "Gotti" and I just couldn't get that line right! Take after take I would say "Getti" and would catch myself just afterward :) Fortunately everyone else found it funny so there was no pressure and it's now just a fun memory.

After we finished filming we had our photo shoot. It was so fun to stand there with my new friends and dance and play and be animated and loud. Then we got to do individual video shots and I just loved everything about it.

Overall it was such a great day and I'm excited to share the information with everyone else!

The last two weeks I had auditions for: Tosh.0, a mystery product, Secret Life of the American Teenager, and Music High (a feature film). Next week it's all about seeing if this pilot gets picked up and I'm filming my industrial! I just got done with rehearsing with the other person in the cast and we're both really excited about this.

Have a blessed weekend all!

Excited!

For those of you who don't know, I ended up booking the industrial. I'm so excited to be filming that next week. But first, I'm going to film my pilot tomorrow! I'm pretty thrilled and I'm praying it goes well (please go well!).

For the past three days I've been on the verge of tears just from being so overwhelmed by everything. Funnily enough, my acting class causes me more stress than anything else throughout the week. I keep thinking about trying another acting teacher because it's really stressing me out. Now that my acting class is done for another week (and possibly two) I'm super excited about my upcoming shoots!

Yay! And next week I film my industrial! Yay! And then I pray the pilot will get picked up and I can film on a regular basis :)

It's a GREAT day

So I'm getting ready to shoot my pilot for next week and the wardrobe stylist will be coming over to my place to help style me! I'm so excited; she's worked with all of the big names in Hollywood and now she will be helping me! Crazy!!

Then my agency just called and I'm on avail for an industrial I had auditioned for a couple of weeks ago. On avail means it's down to two people - hopefully I'll find out soon if I booked it or not. The pay is pretty low for an industrial (less than 1k) but they're REALLY nice people and if I book it, they said to set aside a night where they will take us out for dinner and introduce us to the campus so we can see what it's like. It sounds like so much fun!

Thank you Lord that I'm on my way to getting work.

So, so thankful.

Work and Overwork

I work. A lot. It may not seem like it because I work from home, but I work about 80 hours a week, between working at the law firm, dating website, auditioning, acting business meetings, filming and various other gigs. As a self-employed freelancer (most of those jobs I'm considered an independent contractor), I am also responsible for my own taxes, retirement and healthcare. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by everything because there is JUST SO MUCH!!!

Yesterday while on my way to an audition, between answering law firm emails, a promo company I work with called me in to book me for two gigs in the next few weeks. For those of you who are unfamiliar, promo work is something many actors do as an easy support job: you go in for a few hours to some event, talk with some people and they pay you at the end of it. So far all of my promo work has been for kid events; I go in for 2-3 hours and talk with kids and get paid. It's a great, easy gig and I'm happy I get the opportunity to work. Except I'll be doing that on top of filming my new show (!), working full time at both companies (!!!) and auditioning (!!!).

I was feeling pretty stressed when I talked to a friend of mine who told me to pray. Just sit down and pray. Within seconds I was just so overwhelmed by thankfulness for the opportunities that I get. To have not only one legitimate work-from-home job, but two, plus the flexibility to leave for a few hours to do my acting is great. My income is finally bigger than the average entry-level college graduate - and my time is all my own.

More than anything, it confirms that I am indeed on the right path God has set for me. Though unconventional, God has provided abundantly and looking back, it's so clear that I am doing much better now than I would have been if I took a regular corporate entry-level job. The world told me time and time again that it wasn't the smartest path, but I took the path I believe God intended for me.

With a renewed mindset, I welcome the crazy month of April with all of its challenges and craziness. I pray for additional opportunities if God chooses to provide and I am reminded of this verse:

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.” (Romans 12:2)

Booked!

So remember all of those projects I had talked about in my last post?

I booked the teen talk show pilot! I got the call a couple days ago that they want to hire me. I won't film until the beginning of April but hopefully it'll get picked up and I'll go in once a week to talk and discuss my opinions on things.

Monday I have an audition for Sony, which I'm hoping I book, but it's specifically for "attractive, Abercrombie model types", which means I'll be at a major disadvantage (especially height and body type wise). Not that there is anything wrong with what I look like; I just know I cater to a different, more "real people" or "teen" market and not "runway model".

Overall things are starting to look up and I'm excited. I'll keep everyone posted.

:)

Updates

Somehow, before I knew it, it's been nearly a month since I've updated this blog. I'm so sorry to the few friends that follow my blog.

Things have been slow and I've fallen into this nice routine, which is why I haven't been updating it. Not much has been happening; it's been a steady routine of work, eat, church, acting class, repeat. The industry has been pretty slow for me since January, so I'm really hoping it picks up soon.

This week I had an audition for an American Idol commercial. I auditioned for this exact same spot last year with Cat actually and it was rather memorable, though not for good reasons. Last week I had a Dell commercial, which I felt pretty good about and was rather surprised when I didn't book the job. Oh well...that's the industry.

Tomorrow I have a print audition for Ray Ban (the sunglasses) while my roommate has an audition for "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant". Our audition locations are only a street away so we're going to carpool and cheer each other on.

Then Saturday I have an audition for a hosting position for a teen talk show and Monday my roomie has an audition for a reality tv show (I know!) so it seems like auditions are finally picking back up again and I'm pretty excited.

I think that's about it. It's been wonderful out here and though I stay extremely busy with work ALL THE TIME I'm really enjoying it. I still look forward to the day I can just do acting and only acting.

And what have you been up to????

xoxo

LA Adventures

My friend Jamie reminded me to update my blog. With everything that has been happening I forgot to document my life.

So let's see...what have I been up to?

I've been moving into my new apartment with a friend of mine from college. It's a lovely little 2 bedroom apartment with a lot of room for the 2 of us girls. The apartment building is a small one and the neighbors are extremely friendly. We have many, many squirrels running around all the time. The best part is the location: when I take out the trash I get an amazing view of Hollywood Hills. When I drive down the 101 I get a gorgeous view of city lights. I'm close by two freeways and only 15 minutes away from Hollywood. Ventura Blvd (which is the big street with lots of shops, restaurants and everything else) is only one street away.

The downside of moving to LA? The infamous traffic. It's a given to stay away from freeways from 3-8pm (rush hour) and from 7-10am (morning rush hour) but sometimes out of nowhere there will be extremely heavy traffic at 11am or 12pm. 511 is now my go-to call when I get in my car (for you non SoCal'ers 511 is a traffic hotline).

I've only been here a week and I'm just getting settled in, but now I feel this longing to really explore LA. There are just so many different places and cultures here. It's endlessly fascinating.

Acting has been slow. I've talked to several of my acting girlfriends who are of the same type with different reps and they seem to be experiencing the same thing. So though we're in the midst of pilot season, I guess there isn't much demand for high school/college students right now in casting. Disney and Nick have cast their pilots already and other shows tend to want older or younger actors (think families) rather than college students.

Speaking of Nick, this promo has been airing on Nickelodeon
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMzTfpAGoCo

I think that's all I have. Love you all dearly

xoxo

Jobs and Growing Up

So I recently put the deposit on my new apartment in LA. In a little over a week, I will take that final step of being a completely self-supporting young adult in one of the most expensive cities in the nation. I'll be an LA girl, close enough to my family that everyone is within a few hours drive, but far enough to feel like I'm really independent. Finally.

Of course, being the over-prepared worrier that I am, my biggest concern is to make sure I have enough to support myself while supporting my acting career. I refuse to live up to the starving artist stereotype. I firmly believe you can pursue an artistic career while maintaining a decent standard of living.

So tonight I find myself with 3 jobs. Not including acting. I've always been good at multitasking, but now I'm worried that I may have overdone myself. If so, no worries. The nice thing about having this many jobs is that I can easily leave one and not worry about a huge change in income. But, man, it's a little scary to think about everything I have to juggle.

But don't worry, dear friends. My workloads are light, which is why I don't mind getting several jobs. And I'll actually have Friday nights, Saturdays and Sunday mornings free, which makes it quite doable. So what's my schedule like?

Mondays: 9am-5pm dating site, 8am-6pm law firm, 7pm-11pm acting class

Tuesday: 8am-6pm law firm, 12pm-3pm Groupon-type site, 6pm-12am dating site

Wednesday: 8am-6pm law firm, 12pm-3pm Groupon-type site, 6pm-12am dating site

Thursday: 8am-6pm law firm, 12pm-3pm Groupon-type site, 6pm-12am dating site

Friday: 8am-6pm law firm, 12pm-3pm Groupon-type site

Saturday: Rest :)

Sunday: 9am-11am church, 3pm-8pm church nursery


So looking over my schedule, it seems a little crazy, but it's actually pretty doable. The law firm is really small and I just return phone calls and emails when clients call in. For the Groupon-like site, I just have to make my calls for the day then I'm done. And the dating site is pretty slow, especially at night, when I often find myself killing time by going on Facebook or watching a movie while I work. The best part is if I can handle this workload, I'll be making a very good income for a recent college grad, with all of the flexibility I need to audition and pursue my acting career.

So now I'm really ready to close the college student part of my life and transition to the young working adult part of life. What a wonderful, crazy, blessed, exciting journey life is...

So long UCI

First off, I want to apologize for the lack of posts lately. I have recently redesigned my website and turned it into a Tumblr blog, where I am now frequently posting things. You can check it out at www.dianele.com

However I will of course continue posting more in depth blog posts here, so continue to check back here as well (I know, sorry for all of the confusion!).

So today I went back to my college for the first time in months to take care of some paperwork. As I was walking around I noticed a lot of new faces and a few old familiar ones. When I smiled and said hi to the few old classmates I knew, they simply smiled, acknowledged me and walked on. I was no longer a student here, one of them, but a stranger, a distant memory of some student who went here for a short time. It brought back a flood of negative feelings: feeling outcast, alone, rejected, not good enough for anyone here. The same feelings I had for most of my UCI School of the Arts career (I also attended the School of Business, where I had a completely different, very positive experience).

Yesterday I had an audition for a Marriott commercial and after the audition I went to the Grove to catch up with my friend Sami, who also went to the UCI drama department. I then got a call from my agency for a last minute audition, so Sami and I hung around LA and went to the Beverly Center for food, where we ran into another UCI alumnus.

He was one of the well known, popular kids in the drama department, one of the ones that was frequently cast in shows. He recognized Sami, but I could see it in his eyes...he didn't quite recognize me. And we were in the same major and same graduating class (with each class being about 400 kids, you'd think we would all know each other).

That was my UCI acting experience. I was pretty unhappy with it.

Contrast that with my LA experience, which I'm currently LOVING. My acting teacher and coaches actually believe in me and care about me. When I see people I know at auditions, I don't just get a smile and a nod. I get enthusiasm, hugs and hearty "So how have you been" questions. At every single audition. Even if I haven't seen these people in months. And those that don't know me are so friendly and open to meeting other people.

People often look at my life and comment on how great it is. They are right, I do have a wonderful life and I'm extremely blessed and very thankful. However, my life is so far from ideal. I struggle with rejection, insecurity, and feeling like the outcast. I've never been the "it" girl or anywhere near it. I'm normally the invisible newcomer that no one knows.

But those struggles make me a much better human being and a much better actress. I can understand those complex emotions because I've lived it. I know what it's like to go down a hallway of people hoping to be invisible, because otherwise people would realize that you are friendless. I know what it's like to feel that your teacher doesn't care about you; you aren't her star talent and she just has to go through the motions of trying to teach you acting.

I know. I've been there. Which is why I'm so grateful that I'm out. That's why I'm always thankful for what I now have, because I went without any support or encouragement for so long.

My goal is to never take it for granted and to remain the same person. The person that remembers the struggles.

All the World's a Stage...

In lieu of having an actual acting class, I've resorted to people-watching and people-interacting (we will have to pass that hyphenation off as acceptable for the sake of this entry) as a surrogate form of acting training. Jerry Seinfeld did the same thing, and look how successful a comedian he became. And all his sitcom was about was about nothing. You know. Those little things in life that we brush off as insignificant but are really not. Those "straws that break the camel's back." Brilliant, right?! Why? Because we can all relate to those things. The stuff that happens to the everyday American...toothpaste caps, phone messages, bad dates...we all turn on our TVs, see ourselves in it in a slightly exaggerated way, and then empathetically laugh our hearts out.

So since I am deprived of acting lessons, I created my own. Of course, I did not look at my current job this way until my mom brought it to light for me one day when I was feeling particularly down about it. When you are involved in direct marketing, it goes slightly beyond your standard cup of customer service. Not only do you have to serve, you have to be the whole package; you are the introduction to the product and service; you are the presenter, you are the expert on all things that (whatever "that" may be, fill in the blank here); you are the problem-solver, diagnosing their needs and providing a solution. And of course, you are the one who provides an opportunity for them to fill that need and solve that problem with the product you represent. And finally you take care of them all the way till the final "Congrats!" and handshake.

Working with this marketing company and our top client has definitely been a challenge. Not in terms of skills per se; the ins-and-outs of the required skill set were very easy to learn. No, where the challenge came in was when I was asked to draw from within myself to keep motivated against probable and frequent barrages of negativity and rejection.

Can I just say that when I was little, I totally thought that if you were nice to the world, the world would be nice to you back. Of course, right?! That seems logical. I could not fathom how someone could be mean or snappy for no apparent reason.

Well, flash forward to schooled, practically grown-up me, in this thing called the "real world," meeting all sorts of folk who could easily incinerate you with a stare if their looks could do so much damage. I'm talking about roommates, classmates, groupmates, commuters, coffee-makers, grocers, deans, customers! Anyone and everyone is a possibility for a flare-up. Sometimes in my job all I do is say hi...I don't even get to what I'm supposed to say before they "give me the hand," growl, or snap. And to think - a simple hello!

I know people have lives and problems and such, but let me just say that compartmentalizing (ie, NOT taking your personal problems out on innocent victims) is a valuable skill to learn. Just an FYI.

Who would've thought that rejection could hurt so hard. When I make a pitch to a possible customer and they turn it down flat, they reject our client's service and product, not me. But it sure feels personal. And as a human being, I take it that way most times.

But then...then there are times when things couldn't go smoother. You meet the customers who make your day shine so brightly you want to make homemade banana bread for them. And whether they enlist your services or not, they somehow make such a positive impact on your day it restores your faith in humanity again.

And then of course there are days and times when things move along on an average plane...you get a mix of the no's and yes's and at the end of the day you've been exposed to such different scenarios and characters that you can only laugh. And then eat a hearty dinner and keep moving forward.

Showbiz is a lot like my lovely job. There are times when the wind fills your sails and you fly high. You get an agent, you book a role, you clear a check, you snag a callback; they love you! Then there are times when it seems that the pain of rejection is so bad you begin to question your very place in the industry you know you love so much.

You'll meet grumpy casting directors who judge you based on your "hello"; some agents will cast you aside before giving you a chance to show them what you have to offer; a role may go to someone else (this hurts the most...at least it definitely makes the top five).

But you'll also meet lovely people who look at newbies and go, "sure!", and agents who will take a chance. You'll give your 100% and someone will notice and praise you for it; you'll be the reason the commercial or the film was a success.

And through it all, you must keep trucking. And you have to be self-motivated. And you have to let the negatives ride off your shoulder and focus on the positives.

Above all, you must put God first.

Because anything worth having in this life has got to be something good, and all good things come from God.

God blessed me with this job. Yeah, at times it's hard. I've cried, I'll admit it. I didn't have as thick a skin as I thought. But over these past two months I've seen how beneficial it's been to me. Instead of me paying someone to teach me how to "improv" a conversation on the spot, how to live in the moment, how to pick apart a script, I get paid to do all that and more with the wide variety of clientele we have in the Bay Area. I have broadened my character horizons for story ideas, I've learned to laugh when someone shoves a hand in my face, I've gotten used to dealing with no's and with some of the most difficult people I didn't know existed. I've also learned to appreciate kindness and honesty in others, and how good it feels to receive it. I also know, on a very small scale, what God feels like. Before He can even say hello, some people curse Him to His face, judging Him before they know how wonderful He really is.

There's been a reason I've stayed here in Marketing...God has been teaching me, and He also knew I needed a paycheck :) What a lovely sense of humor He has. He's full of surprises, and He's an ever-patient teacher. The best one.

I've got a lot to learn, no doubt about it. But every moment I get to be refined by Him is a moment I cherish. He'll bring me 'round to my mission soon enough. I hope He steers me towards the film industry again soon...perhaps this has been the training ground, and now I wait to be sent out into "the field" again...this time stronger and more confident than the last time. Ready to face anything, and to know that God truly is in control. To know that in my heart, not only in my head.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
-Jeremiah 29:11

He knows. He knows everything. And He has plans. To think: The God of the Universe has plans for you. Don't let anyone less lead you.

Happy New Year, all. God loves you more than you know.

~Catherine